Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
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