If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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