The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize