My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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