he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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