I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
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