The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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