there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize