I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize