so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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