I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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