ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize