Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Randomize