3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
he puts the penis in happiness.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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