She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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