So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
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Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
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My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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