Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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