When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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