was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Bang-toberfest begins!!
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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