I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize