Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize