They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
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Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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