She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i just google imaged poop.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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