Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
do nipples grow back?
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