but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
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Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
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I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
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