just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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