I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
this just has baby written all over it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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