Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize