party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Randomize