your room smells of hookers.
And success
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
She bit a glass in half.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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