I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
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