you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize