I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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