Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize