oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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