Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize