Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Just cropdusted the office
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
We left an ass print on the piano.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
You're a waste of cheezeits
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Randomize