Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Randomize