At least make sure they are 18
Why
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
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You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
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I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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