oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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