My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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