talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
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