i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize