I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
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