I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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