Texts From Last Night

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  (813): View more from Florida

  Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.

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  (813): Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed. http://tfl.nu/pp8v
  Replies (44) Good night (908) Bad night (5183) Order T-Shirt
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  (845): View more from New York

  I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him

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  (845): I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him http://tfl.nu/y1pg
  Replies (7) Good night (989) Bad night (2761) Order T-Shirt
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.

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  (207): I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole. http://tfl.nu/al7a
  Replies (16) Good night (721) Bad night (3925) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.

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  (847): We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty. http://tfl.nu/2pem
  Replies (13) Good night (3466) Bad night (839) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.

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  (203): I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed. http://tfl.nu/jzfc
  Replies (35) Good night (6078) Bad night (2028) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???

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  (717): Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK??? http://tfl.nu/2k2z
  Replies (13) Good night (3488) Bad night (1185) Order T-Shirt
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.

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  (720): Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head. http://tfl.nu/67uq
  Replies (5) Good night (2472) Bad night (1678) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself

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  (201): I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself http://tfl.nu/d62r
  Replies (34) Good night (2014) Bad night (3562) Order T-Shirt
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.

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  (434): we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino. http://tfl.nu/w9ni
  Replies (3) Good night (2774) Bad night (963) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I cant shower it involves moving...

  (219): View more from Indiana

  Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.

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  (317): I cant shower it involves moving... (219): Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame. http://tfl.nu/d6ka
  Replies (8) Good night (2263) Bad night (493)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em

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  (360): Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em http://tfl.nu/8kd5
  Replies (3) Good night (330) Bad night (1689) Order T-Shirt
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?

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  (774): Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is? http://tfl.nu/utv4
  Replies (7) Good night (1189) Bad night (291) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun

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  (615): The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun http://tfl.nu/o67z
  Replies (4) Good night (1262) Bad night (624) Order T-Shirt
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  (561): View more from Florida

  Woke up in time for my 8:15

  (518): View more from New York

  Good for you I'm impressed

  (561): View more from Florida

  I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester

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  (561): Woke up in time for my 8:15 (518): Good for you I'm impressed (561): I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester http://tfl.nu/b7yv
  Replies (2) Good night (757) Bad night (833)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...

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  (803): He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation... http://tfl.nu/sr4l
  Replies (0) Good night (413) Bad night (125) Order T-Shirt

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