We need to start having sex underwater more often.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
bring money and cleavage
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize