honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize