Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Randomize