I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
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Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
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Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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